As a data-driven analyst raised in LA with a passion for basketball’s hidden narratives, I’ve seen it all— but Jalen Brown’s playoff performance this season? He didn’t just break records; he rewrote them. From 600+ career steals to 5 threes in under 34 seconds, his stat line isn’t just impressive—it’s algorithmically impossible. Here’s what the numbers reveal when emotion fades and logic stays sharp.